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Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Four years ago I graduated from high school.fours years ago I entered college and enrolled in the institution that I am in now. Fours years ago I parted ways with my high school buddies, though not permanently, I no longer see them on a regular basis like we used to. I spent 10 years of my life with these people I call friends, who are almost like brothers to me.
Each one of us became busy with our own lives. Studyin’ or just doin our own things. We have less communication or in the case of others, none at all. Good thing though is that some of us still see each other on a regular basis, on the weekends, to be exact. Sad thing is, I am not inluded in this mini-get together. Its not that I don’t want to be with them anymore, in fact I miss their company, it’s just that weekends are family days for me.
Four years and I got to have new set of friends and so did they. Good thing is we never forgot each other. Our friendship is still there, even if it’s really seldom that I see them, my love for them is still the same during the time that we begin to build this friendship.
Four years pass by and I see my friends one at a time. The last time we got together completely (meaning it included those people who are always absent which particularly includes me and a friend) was during a birthday of our friend. That time we tried to catch up on old times, tell stories and joke around. The thing I observed is that they all have grown except for me. Grown in a manner that they have matured in a lot of ways as compared to what I remember them during high school. They matured in a way I can’t clearly explain but in a good way of course, its like I see them as already somebody responsible and capable enough to start their own family.
I envy them. As I look at myself, I’m still that high school kid. I only aged and matured physically but I admit that I’m still childish in a number of ways particularly my hobbies. Of course I could already handle myself, its just that the things I do mostly are child stuff like video games and comic books. As compared to them, they already experienced a number of things that I still haven’t but I would no longer mention these things because probably you already got an idea of what they are. I know I may not be missing out big time but still those experiences help you grow.
It’s not that im comparing myself with them because there’s no point in comparison, we’re friends. Its just that after these four years I still see myself as a kid, which could be good and bad in a number of ways. Good because I could still enjoy the simplier things in life without having any complications, bad thing though is that I may not be able to know what to do when the time comes for me to mature.
I know its up to me when I would grow up. Its just that im still enjoying my youth (even if im already 20), may be its because I wasn’t able to have the freedom that others do. Its not that im bein’ locked up or anythin’ its just that we we’re all raised up differently. Some are allowed to go out partyin’ and some or not. I’m not sayin’ that im deprived of these things, in fact as I look back there may be a number of times that I want to rebel but I chose not to because I know it would just be pointless. The more I resist, the more complicated things would be so I gave in, which is not a bad decision though because at my age now I now experience the freedom that I previously don’t.
May be that’s the reason why I see my friends more mature than me because their parents know that they are already mature and responsible enough to take care of themselves and thus give them the freedom that they deserve, which is only now that I begin to have. Just like I said earlier Im still childsih in a number of ways reason why may be its only now that my parents start to see that I’m already old enough to start to learn things on my own and be responsible enough for my actions.
Three months from now hopefully I’d be graduating. Im already in the state of completing the requirements for the application of graduation, reason why I did this post because I still can’t believe that I’d soon be leaving the institution I went in four years ago. I also don’t know what to expect when graduation day comes. I still have questions in my mind like; “Am I already ready for the real world?”, “Am I mature enough to take care of myself”, “Would I get a job immediately” and other questions that a kid like me still puzzles about. The only thing I know is that when the time comes or when the situation calls for it, I’d be ready, hopefully.
ending up
I know I don’t always get to write serious thoughts like this, so you may be a little surprised because as you all read from my previous posts I usually write my experiences, plans or activities. May be this is the start that I’m talking ‘bout. May be this post is a sign that I’m beginning to see things in a different light or may be its simply because that I begin to realize that I’m no longer a kid and that I’m not getting any younger. But still I won’t forget or throw away the kid in me because I know for a fact that when I do that, my life wouldn’t be fun anymore.
My thanks for readin’ until the end of another lenghty post which I somehow regularly do.hehe.good day.
i'd also would like to share that i just bought this week the latest albums of my favorite bands particularly that of simple plan's "still not getting any",good charlotte's "the chronicles of life and death" and linkin park & jay-z's "collision course" and just a few weeks ago i mentioned 'bout having new found glory's "catalyst".yipeee!in fact i just finished recording my favorite tracks to my mp3 player.man,i so love these artists.in fact that's what inspired me to have a mohawk haircut which i would be mentioning on mah next post.good thing i'll have something good enough to listen to on the holidays.it's gonna be one punk rockin' holidays.hehe.
this might be my last post for the week because i got no classes tom and on friday because the Immaculate Concepcion celebration was moved tomorrow and on friday would be the investiture of Adamson's new president so it only means that i'd have a long weekend,again.yahooooo!!!until next week.i'm out.
I sent an S.O.S tonight
